Butter Is Hell

Butter. Damn it. Toast needs butter. Coverage is critical. An even spread of fat to the edges of the toasted surface matters most. Correct knife is crucial. Sufficient strokes. Butter enough to make it to the edges without spilling over. Get a gap between crust and crumb and the process must be scrapped. Have pat posed. Toaster pops. Pick toast. Place on surface. Scrape and spread. Get to the border. No drips. No gaps. Gaps. Drips. Eegad. No! Augh! Not perfect. Not. Perfect. Eat or toss? Dilemma. Damn it. Butter. My life is a hell.